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Umairah Nasir speaks to Lynn Lim, a senior operations manager, on her 10-year journey through IVF treatments while in a demanding leadership role, the silence around fertility struggles at work, and why support for women should start before motherhood, not after.
Singapore’s birth rate has reached a historic low, raising growing concerns about workforce sustainability. The country’s total fertility rate fell to 0.87 in 2025, its lowest on record, highlighting the scale of the challenge and its long-term implications for the workforce. While there have been more efforts to support working mothers, less attention is given to women who are trying to become mothers, especially women leaders who often face added pressures at work.
Recent policy enhancements reflect this focus on parenthood. From 1 April 2026, eligible parents can receive up to 10 weeks of shared parental leave, strengthening support during a child’s first year. What’s notable is that these measures largely come into play after a child is born. At the same time, global trends suggest that workplace support is not always moving in one direction, with some organisations scaling back certain family-related benefits such as IVF funding and parental leave as part of broader cost and workforce restructuring efforts.
Trying to conceive, particularly through IVF, can be both physically and emotionally demanding. Many women go through this journey without adequate workplace support, despite the impact it can have on their wellbeing and performance.
There is also growing recognition that fertility is a workplace issue that organisations can no longer overlook. Fertility challenges can not only affect an employee's physical and emotional wellbeing, but also take a toll on their performance and career decisions, with some reducing their workload or even leaving their jobs due to a lack of support. As expectations shift, more employers are starting to explore inclusive measures such as flexibility, time off for treatment, and emotional support, remains limited.
A story rarely told
For Lynn Lim (pictured above), a senior operations manager who prefers to keep her company anonymous, speaking up is not an easy decision.
All views shared by Lim are based on her personal experience and do not represent her organisation.
Her journey spans a decade of trying to conceive, including multiple rounds of IVF treatment, all while leading a team and managing the pressures of work.
“I think this topic is something that women do not dare to stand up to speak about,” she says.
“We recognise that as women, we’re supposed to be mothers, and I think it's very difficult to come up to talk about it.”
Her decision to share her story is shaped by a recurring observation. Much of the public narrative around women in leadership centres on motherhood, often celebrating how women balance careers and family life. While important, this narrative does not reflect the full spectrum of women’s experiences.
“I always see articles featuring how most of the career women are mothers, and I was thinking, women are more than that,” she says.
Over the years, Lim went through two rounds of egg extraction and multiple embryo transfers. None were successful. Along the way, she experienced the physical toll of hormone jabs, including gaining about 30kg, as well as the emotional strain of repeated disappointment.
What stood out to her most in the process was the silence around the intersection of fertility and work – even in IVF support groups she joined. “Nobody really talks about their career,” she notes.
“They only talk about the personal journey, about, the pain, the weight gain, the mood fluctuations, but no one actually talked about how they were when they were at work.”
Leading through personal pain
Balancing fertility treatments with a leadership role brings its own set of challenges. The process requires frequent medical appointments, strict scheduling, and periods of recovery, often needing to use medical or hospitalisation leave.
Beyond logistics, the emotional impact is harder to manage.
“Especially being a leader, you have to manage your own emotions or failed procedures and the raging hormones,” Lim says.
At times, she questions her own reactions at work, asking whether she is “a little bit edgy” or responding to a real mistake. To cope, she developed ways to manage her emotions while continuing to lead her team.
Despite the internal struggles, she continued to support those around her. In one instance, she helped a team member through a failed pregnancy, offering flexibility and redistributing workload, even as she navigated her own fertility journey privately.
This dual role reflected a reality many women face but rarely discuss openly.
The missing conversation at work
From Lim’s perspective, one of the biggest gaps in workplace support is the absence of open dialogue.
“There are no talks about it at all,” she says.
“To get support, someone has to know what you’re going through.”
While awareness around mental health and flexible work have improved, fertility remains a sensitive topic. Many employees hesitate to disclose their situation due to stigma or fear of judgement.
This silence is reflected more broadly across workplaces, where fertility is still not widely embedded into wellbeing or inclusion strategies, despite its growing impact on employees and organisations alike.
Rethinking support beyond maternity
One of the key ideas Lim raises is the need to rethink how organisations structure support.
“[There are] so many talks about giving [employees] maternity leave, but what about those who are also trying?” she asks.
She suggests the idea of “pre-maternity” support, which could include time-off for fertility treatments, flexible work arrangements, or clearer policies that recognise the demands of trying to conceive.
Currently, many employees rely on existing leave types such as medical, annual, and hospitalisation leave, which may not be sufficient for ongoing treatments. This creates additional stress, especially when employees have to balance their health needs with work expectations.
At the same time, Lim acknowledges the complexity from a business perspective, including concerns about operational impact. However, she emphasises that starting the conversation is key.
"It starts with the company policies- that they are willing to address it before having staff come to them,” she says.
Creating a culture of trust and understanding
Beyond formal policies, workplace culture plays a crucial role. For employees to seek support, they need to feel safe sharing their experiences.
Lim highlights the importance of trust between employees and managers, highlighting that open communication can help teams better manage workloads and provide the flexibility needed during challenging periods.
Her own approach as a leader reflects this. Even without formal structures, she makes adjustments where possible to support her team members through difficult moments.
Expanding the definition of “support”
At a broader level, organisations can consider expanding employee assistance programmes, offering counselling support, and equipping managers to handle sensitive conversations with care.
Lim’s story highlights the need to broaden how organisations define support for women at work.
After 10 years, she says, she has come to terms with her journey and now hopes to encourage others who may be going through similar experiences. After all, as she points out, there are still many people out there who are suffering behind closed doors while still trying to carry out their responsibilities as leaders at work.
Sharing her words of encouragement with them, she says: "You are even stronger than you think.”
“You are not alone, despite being the minority. You just have to reach out, like me, and take the first step to highlight this issue.”
As organisations continue to invest in diversity and inclusion, there is an opportunity to widen the lens. Supporting women should not begin at motherhood, but earlier, recognising the full spectrum of experiences, including those who are trying, struggling, or unable to become mothers.
In doing so, employers can build more inclusive workplaces that acknowledge not only visible milestones, but also the quieter journeys that often go unseen.
“There's more that can be done to raise greater awareness, understanding, and support in the workplace,” Lim affirms.
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Images / Provided
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